[relocated from Facebook, and back-dated. composed prior to the release of the seventh book]
Weinbloom & Wolahan bring you:
HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS
The Drinking Game
We recommend using M&Ms in lieu of actual alcohol for this game, unless you are particularly talented at reading while smashed.
Enjoy!
Take a drink every time:
Harry’s scar hurts
Someone shouts in ALL CAPS
Hermione encourages reference to “Hogwarts, A History”
Three drinks if someone other than Hermione mentions “Hogwarts, A History”
Malfoy insults someone’s parents
2 if someone actually manages to restrain their anger when Malfoy insults their parents.
Five drinks if we finally get a decent “your mom” joke in response
Drink if Ron and Hermione start bickering
2 if Ron and Hermione start snogging
Trelawney predicts someone’s imminent death
Rowling foreshadows someone’s imminent death
2 when someone actually dies who wasn’t foreshadowed at all
Aunt Petunia purses her lips
Bad pun in a proper noun (ie, Diagon Alley)
Two drinks for a good pun
There’s evidence that journalists and newspapers in the Wizarding world are corrupt
Two drinks if a journalist does something good
Hermione runs away to do something without any explanation
Drink every time you get furious about a character’s immense and stubborn stupidity
Snape sneers
Lupin looks shabby
Tonks trips over something
Neville trips over something
Peeves smashes something
Hagrid breeds something
Ron or Harry refer to S.P.E.W as “Spew”
Nearly Headless Nick adjusts his head
Someone new stops calling Voldemort “You-Know-Who”
2 if she explains the "triumphant look"
Dobby extolls Harry's greatness
Ron runs from spiders
Fleur kisses someone on the cheek
Someone says Harry has his mother's eyes
Harry tallies the remaining horcruxes
3 if RAB is NOT Regulus Black
Finish if Harry ends up being the only one who thinks Snape is good
If Snape really truly is evil, send JKR a Howler
Someone says something darkly
2 if Neville and Luna hook up
2 if Harry attempts to use an Unforgivable curse
Finish the drink if he succeeds
Have another entire drink if he is immediately filled with remorse
Harry returns to the curtain at the Department of Mysteries
2 if he finds Sirius there
Kreacher sulks
Harry complains about the unpleasantness of apparition
2 if Neville saves the day
Fawkes returns
Harry enrolls at Hogwarts for his seventh year after all
Harry pines for Ginny
Mrs. Weasley cooks
Hagrid is a poor cook
Any "sickening thud"
Harry enters a pensieve
Mrs. Weasley's clock is referenced
Hermione has exam anxiety
2 if Hermione has exam anxiety though not enrolled in school
3 if someone ends up going to college
4 if it's a Muggle college
Finish the bottle if it's Harvard
The first chapter starts outside Harry's point of view
The last chapter ends outside Harry's point of view
There's an epilogue summarizing the rest of everyone's lives
Any clearly slash-y line that slipped past the editors (ie, "Who's Cedric, your boyfriend?")
Ron and Hermione make each other jealous
Aberforth Dumbledore appears
Aberforth Dumbledore appears, with goats
Hogwarts has a drastically reduced student population
Hogwarts is under threat of being closed
Petunia displays more knowledge of wizarding world
2 if the Dursleys do something right for once
Muggles get involved in the war
Hermione mentions, talks to, or (gasp!) visits her parents
Hermione sneaks into the Hogwarts Library while not a student
The three don't fit under the invisibility cloak
This Lupin/Tonks thing turns out to be something else entirely
Harry has a monster in his stomach/chest/other awkward body part
2 if JKR writes a remotely legit romance subplot
Mutter grumpily if she completely screws up Ron/Hermione
Malfoy is shown sympathetically
Snape is shown sympathetically
There's a connection between Godric's Hollow and Godric Gryffindor
Any time someone we've heard of dies
Harry remembers that everyone he loves is dead
Ron gets in the way
Ron does something really great and important
Ron gloats about great and important thing for next three weeks
If it takes Ron more tries to pass his apparition test than it took you to pass your driving test (sulk in the corner if you still can't drive)
Harry doubts his father's integrity
2 if Harry manages to win the day without having destroyed all the horcruxes
3 if Harry is a horcrux
Finish if Harry kills himself
Voldemort is destroyed in an as-yet-unpredictable fashion that isn't avada kedavra
Finish if Voldemort is destroyed with love. And complain loudly.
Thursday, July 19, 2007
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